Reblog: Manipulated by Christian Grey (by Me, a Fifty Shades Avoider)

AMEN. Shout it from the rooftops! That is just how my first relationship (which led to my first marriage) started out, when he began pursuing me. He overwhelmed me in such a short space of time and because ‘he was vulnerable’ I didn’t know how to say no… plus I’d not properly recovered from the sexual abuse of my childhood nor had a boyfriend before. He must have thought he was the spider that trapped the fly when he met me. In my EMDR session today I was recalling all those seemingly small, seemingly non-abusive moments right at the beginning of the ‘relationship’. Coercion, manipulation: subtle forms of evil but nevertheless evil.

But hallelujah for therapy and hallelujah for a wonderful, kind, patient husband. ‘The Lord is my shepherd; I have everything I need.’

Laura Droege's blog

Ruth Perry over at The Beautiful Kingdom Warriors posted a huge list of links about the response to Fifty—oh, never mind, you know what book it is. I read a few. One that I found especially intriguing was from a woman who had survived an abusive relationship: “Fifty Abusive Moments in Fifty Shades of Grey.” I’ll be writing about numbers 48 and 50.

In the interest of full disclosure, I have not read the book, have no plans to read the book, and absolutely no intention of wasting time and money on a movie based on the aforesaid book. Normally, I think people should read a book/watch a movie if they’re going to critique it; I’ve made an exception here.

Second full disclosure: I’ve never been in a physically abusive relationship, though my first relationship falls into the “emotionally abusive” category. I wasn’t certain that this was true until…

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4 thoughts on “Reblog: Manipulated by Christian Grey (by Me, a Fifty Shades Avoider)

  1. Thank you for the reblog, Sandy, and thank you for your courage in speaking out against abuse, sharing your story, and sharing how God has healed/is healing/will continue to heal you from your wounds. You have a beautiful heart, sister.

  2. I am praising God with you for the therapy and for his grace and mercy. The healing is so much work and you are working at it bravely, with hope and faith, always gracefully. I am remembering you, Sandy, knowing prayer is valuable in this process.

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